Carnival of Souls

With Carnival of Souls in the background its the perfect mood to this setting... Am nearly gnawing my knuckles at the thought of peanuts my red flag nemesis. Was absolutely starving on way home from gym, had a headache felt nauseous and a burning feeling in my throat. Ended up grabbing a 300 cal sandwich and not having any dinner at home. Calories consumed 1298 today. Feel absolutely meh but have read a few blogs. just cant keep awake feeling very flat. Im sure it will pass but today I am just not feeling the power, i know that its just cause I am feeling sick but I know just sticking to perfect nutrition the rest will follow. I have lost 55kg before with moderate exercise and nutrition was spot on so its about the food intake and the exercise is a bonus to speed things up. Gym tomorrow or a Jillian Michaels DVD or run. Will sign off now just had to take my mind off food. Will enjoy that skinny feeling when I wake up. Cannot wait to buy some new ingredients for the 12WBT menus, I havent really been inspired, the wraps and tuna this or berry bruschetta is BLERGH. am loving week 2 menus, its looking up, will have to print out a heap from the index and get cookin and movin! Talk soon in a better frame of mind. Oh I realised I didnt have much water today so there ya go theres always a logical explanation for everything, this headache isnt going away so off I go to get some sleep. Mish was right, need to get some beauty sleep to seize the day tomorrow!!!!!

Start of something wonderful

Hello lovelies! This is my first online blog which I have been talking about for a while, the fact that I should set one up. I have just spent a week at the beach on a silent retreat which was the best thing myself or anyone with any depression issues or ANY kind of anxiety problem hell we all need to learn the skills to help process those inner feelings which can spiral out of control and turn into something sinister if not dealt with in a healthy manner. I learnt alot about myself and will need to rewire that little brain upstairs to ensure I practise patience, tolerance and compassion for all beings and situations. Everyone has their journey, what they think about me is none of my business. Its about living in the now, not focusing on the past or future but in the present. Love and Peace is the focus, finding your true self and healing that little person inside from all past hurts. "Hurt people HURT people" and its important to deal with this and break the chains so the cycle does not continue through the generations. Treat each person with love and respect as you would expect to be treated. Send love out in the universe and good things will come back to you. Trust me it works. Like treating the body with respect with good food, water and emotions. It all comes together in the right balance. Eat lollies, processed junk, drink and smoke and go around blaming the world and spreading hate and what happens to that shell? I dont need to tell you but years of sugar abuse, unhealthy behaviours and letting your body go in a bloated mess, you feel like death is knocking on your door every day until one day its a reality. What a waste. All that negative energy attracts negative energy like a magnet. It can be turned around though, it doesnt have to end that way.

Right no more shitness, 12wbt is starting, big changes a-happenin, meditation a MUST, healthyness a must. MUST get my stats and pics together when Im back in Sydney, feel so behind but Im feeling confident that I can get through the next 12 weeks and just JFDI, so strange I like the silence too much. Time to concentrate to get my soccer bod back in time for 1st winter game lets just go with the flow lise, go with the flow. Another thing I learnt at the retreat was to diarise and journal your feelings, I know I keep talking about it. I may have to validate my feelings in this online blog and just let each day out as it happens. I will have to be selfish and just focus on ME the next 12 weeks and not let any outside influence affect me or my progress.The only way is forward and change needs to come from within. Alot of late night MKR and BL online watching is to be had! :) Okay blog is set up its basic but its all i need. The next few months will be concentrating on simplicity and taking each day as it comes.

so to summarise

Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation program 1200 calories for 12 weeks. Exercise at least 500 cals a day burnt and 1000 on Saturdays. Sundays a rest day.

Gawd I havent had access to scales in over a week that shall be interesting when I return. and Ill have to get my measurements etc. It will be a tough 3 months but will be worth it. I just need to give myself the best chance I have of success.

Will leave this alone now, I didnt think it would take this long to write. YAY I see my husband again soon after a week and a bit away. Sure it doesnt beat the 16 months he was away in rehab but still its a long time to be away! I cant stay in silence forever!

Till next blog, stay clean and mean! :)